Cliff Pant-one

They've made a Snuggie for dogs!

Okay, now I've seen it all!  They've made SNUGGIES for DOGS!!!  You have GOT to go to this website and check out the video.  These dogs are a great- verging on Oscar worthy.  They actually seem to like wearing their Sunggies.

I ALMOST want to buy one of these.  It would be great to put one on Tyra.  I wonder what it would look like belted and a little jazzed up?  I think she's love it.  Of course, then I'd have to chase her around with the camera, and she does NOT like being photographed.  Such is life!

Anyways, if any of you decides to purchase a Snuggie for your pooch, you must tell me how it is.  And I'll give some advice: shell out the extra dinero for the EXTRA luxurious fleece material.  It's worth it.

So hopefully the Snuggie for felines will be out soon.  It doesn't seem fair to let the cats miss out on all the really good things in life.

Tyra's Electroshock Therapy!

Because it has been so cold, I got Tyra a new hoodie.  (By the way, I got it from a new locally owned store called Unleashed in the Lake Boone Shopping Center--- go there.)  So, I took her to the post office with me, and as soon as she got in the car, static electricity took over and every hair on her body stood up.  It was adorable.  I tried getting a picture, but Tyra hates the camera.  The only way I could get a decent shot was to get outside of the car and pretend like I was about to let her out (which I eventually did).  See for yourself:

This is absolutely what Sara Goldfarb would look like if she were a Shih Tzu.

I love my dog.

The cutest thing I've seen all year!

Yes, I'm one of those sick people who thinks it's adorable to put dogs in clothes.  Hey!  At least I'm upfront about it! Anyways, I saw these pictures on www.puppyangel.com .  It's a wholesale dog apparel website.  Even if you're not a retailer looking for merch, it's worth going to that site just to look at  the cutest pictures ever in the whole world.  Yes, that is a bold statement, but I'm confident I can back it up. 

Have a gander:

 

 

I'm fully willing to admit that, after seeing these photos, I'm planning to grow Tyra's ears out so that I can braid them.  I can hardly stand it, it's so cute!  Okay.  Go to the aforementioned site for more shots! 

WTF: Drugged-out Aussie Kangaroo Dancing at Volleyball Game

 

This is a still from the Aussie Shampoo commercial- the one where they're all playing volleyball, and this guy is on the side lines dancing like a spasming starfish.  I find it highly entertaining.  They're just playing ball, and then they flash over, for like a split second, to said marsupial.  He looks insane. He's just convulsing for a second, humping the air. His tongue is hanging out of his mouth, for Chrissake.  It's like he took some Xanax before the game and is trying to muster up the energy to cheer and look alive.  Oh me.  Just makes me laugh.  Here's the full commercial:

Misty Water Colored Memories: Amy is a Randy Bunny on the Loose

I'm having Bloggers' Block (it's a curse), and I can't think of anything to write about.  Even with Christmas going on, I'm stuck with a blank!  So, I dug up some old photos of a very fun time in my life. 

At some point in college, my best friend, Amy, (whom I'm mere hours away from seeing, because she is coming to town) selflessly volunteered to wear an Easter Bunny suit and pose for photos with people's pets at a local pet store.  I'm pretty sure it was for some charity...we could all do more service work!  

Well, Amy pleaded with the owners or renters of the bunny suit, and got them to allow her to borrow the costume for one extra hour. 

So, I'm sitting at my lovely house on Dixie Trail, and Amy plows into my drive way.  She was calling me on her cell phone.  "COME OUTSIDE," she said.  "I HAVE TO SHOW YOU THIS!!"

I waked outside, and she was grappling with the trunk.  As it lifted, I saw the giant bunny costume.  The possibilities were endless.  "We only have an hour," she said.

With Amy's great modeling/acting skills and my knack for master photography, this is what came of that hour:

This is "Peeping Amy Bunny" peering into our neighbor's window.
Not sure exactly what this one was portraying...
In this one, she is suggestively straddling a tiki torch.  Feel free to let your imagination run wild.
A close up to scare the children.

This one, in which we took to the streets, is my personal favorite. 

There are more photos from this day, which according to the file's folder was in March 05, but I cannot seem to locate them.  One such missing pic was what appeared to be Amy straddling a bench and "riding" it like a quarter horse.  I wish I could find that one. 

Spotted: "Happy" Turtle/Tortoise

It seems that I've been posting quite a few genetalia blogs lately!  They're just flowin' like The Jordan!  I guess we know what's on my mind!  I kid! I kid! 

Anyways, I went to the Audubon Zoo in New Orleans over the weekend.  Me and my friend were looking at the giant tortoises or turtles or whatever, and we noticed this one was all rolled over on his side.  Actually, everybody noticed.  A large crowd was drawing. He was all wiggling around like he was stuck- just rockin back and forth.  Then me and Amy noticed that his manhood was exposed, and THAT is why everybody was so intrigued. Poor little guy.  Everybody was just standing there staring at him and his junk (a bunch of pervs) pointing and laughing!  Although, the tortoise/turtle DID kind of look like he was stretched out in a seductive pose with his tube steak strategically placed to lure in the ladies (lady turtles/tortoises that is). Maybe he liked the crowd?  I don't know. 

I also don't know if this is a weird thing to post.  It seemed like a good idea when I started writing, but now I just feel uncomfortable and creeped out.  I hope this entry doesn't attract a slew of people with turtle fetishes...

Anyways, here is the picture for all you weirdos:
Probably not the best angle.  A shot from the other side would have shown more.  Actually, this view is fine.  I think we've seen enough!

XOXO- Mr. Pant-one

Spotted: No More Badgers Magnet

All throughout NC (I think), they have these TV commercials for Johnson Automotive with this hilarious badger car salesman.  The badger tries to sell people cars, and he's really rude to them.  My favorite badger quote comes when he's pitching a car to a woman and the badger says, "There's a rear-view mirror- that's where you can put on your makeup..."

Anyways, it's much funnier when you actually see the badger, so here's a Youtube video of all the commercials put together:

 

Now you see what a riot they are!  I mean it's impossible to keep a straight face when the badger says, "DON"T TALK TO ME; I"M ON MY POPCORN BREAK!"  And what about his crazy wiggle room dance?!  That wonky furball gets me every time!

Well, this guy who lives in my sisters neighborhood has a magnet on his car.  Here it is:  

Isn't that hilarious?!?  I have never seen another one of these.  I mean, I guess if they are giving them out at the dealership, most people would probably just put it on the fridge and NOT on their new car.  I would put it on mine... It's way cooler than those magnetic soccer balls and charity ribbons everybody is slapping on these days.  My cousin from out of town was like, "Why does that person have a giant animal in a suit on his car?!"  I imagine it would be quit puzzling if you didn't know what that was.  It's huge!  It's genius!  How can I get one for the Subaru?!

XOXO~Cliff Pant-one

Halloween Costumes for Dogs

Being that I'm obsessed with Halloween costumes, I stumbled upon some get-ups for dogs.  These are so funny, but it's also kind of sad- the dogs look suicidal.  I am guilty of dressing Tyra up, but I take her out of the outfit if it's obvious that she's miserable in it.  I mean, she has a few dresses/hoodies that she really loves- really! 

So without further delay:

 

This dog might actually like the Yoda costume. 

   

This makes me laugh really hard! 

 

This one does NOT look thrilled!

 

This poor dog is supposed to be Kenny from South Park!

 

This dog looks better in her Wonder Woman costume than I do! Check out those stems!

 

This is a Hippie.  I just thought it was weird.

And here is a crazy looking dog nurse!

After compiling that, I have decided that Tyra will not be dressing up for Halloween.  Maybe I will get her a hoodie with a pumpkin on it or something.  She REALLY does love those, especially right after a  haircut!

Do NOT Give Your Kid a Weird Name

I named my dog Tyra. Although she was not named after her, my dog happens to have the same name as television personality/model Tyra Banks. I saw my dog and just thought, this dog screams 'call me Tyra'. When I gave my dog this name, I figured that enough people would have heard of Tyra Banks to know how to pronounce the name. Apparently, I was wrong.

Nobody can get my dog’s name right!

Tara is the most common mispronunciation. Tarah comes in a close second. She’s also been called Tyrell, Tyrone and Tyler.

It doesn’t bother me. I think it’s pretty hilarious. I mean, Tyrone?!  

I used to want to give my kids weird names like Bijou and Loulah (ok, I still like Loulah…), but now I’ve realized that it probably would be pretty annoying for a kid to go through life with such a difficult name. I mean, people can’t even figure out Tyra, and there’s a pretty popular Emmy Award-winning talk show host with that name!

Just some food for thought!

Mushrooms and Squirrels Taking Over Cameron Village

All of a sudden, my neighborhood is full of mushrooms and batshit crazy squirrels.  The mushrooms aren't really a problem.  They're just random, and they're huge.  I have always had a strong desire to step on or kick giant mushrooms, but I'm really fighting that this time around.  I want to leave them intact because they're pretty much textbook toadstools.  The structure is flawless.  I saw one the other day with a cap the size of a knit beret!    Anyways, I find it odd that I've never seen a single mushroom around here, and now there are like a hundred.  I took a picture of some, and I rather fancy my photo.  So I will share:
Beautiful, isn't it?

Now the squirrels are more of a nuisance. For one, my dog wants to chase them all over the place.  This distracts her from urinating/defecating quickly in the morning, which in turn leaves me running around in front of the house like a lunatic wearing PJs and a coif that could be the result of a crossbreed between Don King and Martha Washington.

Besides that, the squirrels have been having an acorn war of sorts.  The A/C unit is right outside my window.  It's large and metal, as I assume most A/C units are.  Well the squirrels sit in a big tree right by the unit and dive-bomb acorns onto the hard surface.  When the acorns hit the A/C unit, it creates a loud clangy noise.  From the noise these nuts are producing, I imagine these acorns to be the size of human toddlers.  It's insane, and it wakes me up.  The other day I woke up at like 6 a.m. wondering why in the world my roommate would be walking around in stilettos at that hour.  I thought maybe she was getting ready for work early.  Then I realized it was THE SQUIRRELS.  They are relentless! 

I just wanted to share my experience so that if others are going through the same thing, they'll know that they're not alone.  Maybe my story can help somebody.

Four Paws "Pimple Ball with Bell" is A VERY Dangerous Dog Toy!

  I received an email at work today about a dog toy that had caused serious injury to Chai, a yellow lab mix.  The toy is called "Pimple Ball with Bell," and it is made by Four Paws Inc. 

The ball got stuck on Chai's tongue.  After having the ball surgically removed, Chai's tongue was left so swollen that he could not put it back in his mouth.  Eventually, the doctors decided that the tongue was left in such damaged condition by the ball, that it had to be completely amputated. 

This is a really sad story.  The poor dog was just trying to have fun and play, and this terrible thing happened!

Everything is told in great detail on Chai's owner's blog .  Please go to that site to read about Chai, and join the owner in boycotting the Four Paws Inc. product line until they take the "Pimple Ball with Bell" off the shelves!  Forward that blog on, so that everybody with a dog will know to stay away from this toy!!! 

http://www.thechaistory.blogspot.com/ 

Spotted: North Raleigh Guinea Hen

Every now and then, I have to go to this one office near the intersection of Creedmoor and Strickland.  I won't say which office, because I don't want you all bombarding the place, fighting one another to catch a glimpse of what I'm about to discuss. 

Anyways, this office is totally normal.  There is an entrance with a grassy area in front, like most places.  But the first time I went there, I noticed a strange bird meandering around the lawn.  It was large and looked like a turkey without so many feathers.  It looked smooth- almost wax like- and very round.  Not being the biggest fan of birds, I quickened my pace and hurried inside. 

I warned the receptionist that there was a strange bird outside, but she remained calm.  "Oh, that's just a guinea hen," she told me.  "It's always out there."

"Like a pet?"  I inquired.

"Not really, but I mean...maybe."

I left the building, scratching my head.  That thing is sick, I thought.  I sat in my car trying to get a decent shot of the bird on my phone, but all my pictures sucked. 

Thankfully, I went back today.  This time, I was able to get a clearer photo.  Here it is:

It still isn't the best photo, because I was too afraid (and embarrassed that the receptionist would see me) to get any closer or look any more obvious.  So here is a picture of one that I found online:

This is exactly what it looked like!  Ugh, that is so freighting.  I really do not like the feathered species.  I'm sorry.  I love animals, but my mother scarred me for life by instilling the idea in my mind that birds are disease-ridden creatures that will give you germs and ultimately kill you.  I know better now, but I still don't like birds.  It's part of the reason I stopped eating them.  UGH, SICK! 

Apparently, these are featherless birds that are native to Africa!  Hmm.  Suspicious!  I guess they are the Chinese Crested of fowl! 

Okay, so anyways...I just find it incredibly odd that these birds are roaming around North Raleigh.  I mean, it's a far cry from Africa.  It is interesting though.  I guess it's just another new experience to treasure.   

So, I want a lot of dogs...

I have decided that I want four dogs.  The first, of course, being Tyra.  She can claim her position as "the alpha-female."  Then when I move out of my current apartment with Jen, I want to get another Shih Tzu (Twiggy)  As I like to say, one Shih Tzu is never enough.  Actually, that is the first time I've ever said that, but getting it out for the first time has made me really believe it. 

After that, I want to get a Goldendoodle.  I plan to call this Goldendoodle Chachi (like Scott Bayo on Happy Days).  This may have to be once I've moved into an actual house with a fenced in back yard. 

And FINALLY, once I have a family I think, I will get my Weimaraner who might be named Steven or something.  I'm not sure yet.  Maybe Vanessa if it is a girl. 

And MAYBEEE if I'm feeling impulsive, I'll get a Pekingese named Twinkle Toes.  I hope I have a big house.  Maybe I'll have to marry a farmer, so we can have a lot of land.  It's hard finding farms in Raleigh though.  I really don't want to move to the middle of nowhere.  I guess there is always on-line shopping though...

Here is a photo of my future pack for you to admire (click to enlarge):

Want a dog?  RESCUE a pet today!  Click HERE for the SPCA of Raleigh! 

Yeah, this is random.

This might be really weird (or lame...or dorky), but I LOVE to watch this little video about Yahoo the dog!  I have never met Yahoo.  I have no idea where he/she is in the world.  I just happened to find it one day, and it made me so happy!  I just love Shih Tzus!  In fact, I think this video is what inspired me to get Tyra. 

So anyway, this video always puts a smile on my face.  I dedicate this to anybody who is feeling blue or stressed out today.  Your day is about to get better!  Here it is, the wonder that is YAHOO!

Teddy Hilton

Perez Hilton has a mini Goldendoodle named Teddy Hilton.  It is one cute dog!  I just had to post a picture of ole Teddy.  Of course, Tyra is my first canine love- but I might just have to get a Goldendoodle to be Tyra's BFF.  Click here for more pics of Teddy!

"Feel Beautiful In This Skin"

Just a quick little post-  I thought this picture was so hilarious!  T yra got a hair cut and has been emotionally stressed for about a week.  Besides hiding her butthole in the corner of the couch (protecting her anal glands from being expressed again), she hasn't been doing much of anything.  In true diva fashion, she was feeling a little self-conscious about the new look.  Anyways, she finally posed for a picture, and this is the result.  Her confidence is slowly but surely being restored and she's getting back to feeling beautiful in her skin!