Cliff Pant-one

Spotlight on Toe Heads

Toe heads are just one of the many breed of men I fancy (I do not discriminate)!  Who can resist that pale skin and white blonde hair?!  Not me!  That's for sure.  Add in a pair of big ole plump lips, and you've created a walking dream!  I was googling "famous pale people," "famous blonde pale men," and "famous toe heads," and believe it or not, the results were not plentiful.  George Washington kept coming up...

So figuring that I'm not the only one out there with a passion for toe heads, I thought I'd do you all the service of highlighting some lovely blondes so that if you ever google "famous albinos," your search actually might turn up some results. (And PS I'm not sure if these people are all 100% certified toe heads, but you work with what you can...)

Michael Pitt (toe featured above) is my number one yellow locked man.  He's got it down.  This man needs no caption.

Ryan Gosling: He could use a little Sun-In.  He's teetering on the edge of dirty blonde, but who doesn't love Noah Calhoun?  Maybe one of the world's most loved wheat haired men.

Spencer Pratt (on left in picture above): Not my favorite toe, but a toe nonetheless (and Spence, you should stay out of the sun.  Tans don't look good on toes!  Plus, you're more prone to get a narsty sunburn). 

 

Nick Carter: I have a feeling his blonde might have come from a bottle, but I'll let it slide.  Well, only if he'll get his brother, Aaron, to dance for me.

Macaulay Culkin: Classic.  He looks a lot like Michael Pitt to me, but not as dashing. 

Aaron from Taking The Stage (on left): Seeing as he's still in high school, he's our juvie toe.  He's even taking tips from Spencer, growing his own flesh colored beard!

Chet from The Real World: Virgin Toe!

So there you have it.  I hope that everybody searching for fair skinned male beauties on the internet can find some sanctuary here. 

Just trying to do my part. 

Cliff's Most Fascinating People: Michael Pitt

Michael Pitt is an actor.  Over the last few weeks, I've grown increasingly fond of him.  I was reading Girl Boy Girl, the memoir of Savannah Knoop (one of the women behind the infamous  J.T. Leroy literary hoax), and Michael Pitt was mentioned as a friend of "J.T." 

In Knoop's book, it was said that Pitt had been a regular on Dawson's Creek.  The book also said that the producer's of Dawson's Creek weren't happy about Pitt being in The Heart is Deceitful Above All Things (movie of J.T.'s book) and some other films. 

Well...I'll admit, I was a fan of the creek.  Shocking, I know!  I guess I just had a soft spot for Pacey Witter.  Who could resist?!  Anyways, I didn't recognize Pitt's name, and I wanted to know which character was doing all these unwholesome movies, so of course I IMDBd him.  Turns out that Mr. Michael played Henry, Jen Lindley's freshman football boyfriend.  OH HENRY!  The innocent little guy, falling victim to Jen's cougar like charms. 

So blah blah blah.  Just a bunch of background!  Why is Michael Pitt fascinating?!  I'll tell you why! 

NUMBER ONE: He is in some really great movies!  Some of them are pretty edgy and controversial. It's hard to conceive Pitt is the same buck who tossed pigskin for Capeside High.  I loved The Dreamers(although not recommended for those without open minds, strong stomachs or appreciation for full frontal nudity).  I also enjoyed Deliriousimmensely.  He also has like a million other movies that I still need to check out. 

NUMBER TWO: He looks like Leonardo DiCaprio circa Basketball Diaries.  For me, just that is reason enough to be one of CP's most fascinating.  I read that book (and pretty much anything my good friend Jim Carrol wrote) and watched that movie a million times throughout my youth.  Maybe that's saying something... Besides looking like Leo/my personal image of Jim, he is just really beautiful.  Not in a conventional way...he's very...ok, I'm going to stop before I throw up just listening to myself.

NUMBER THREE: He's an Aries.  Enough said.

NUMBER FOUR:  He plays guitar in a band called Pagoda.

So yes, I find Michael Pitt to be very fascinating.  He's a great actor, and from what I've read, he is really serious about his craft.  It seems to me that he may be a fan of the good ole' Stanislavski Method!  I'd like to think that'd be my method of choice should I ever decide to give it a go in the acting world, but that's besides the point.  On top of that, he doesn't seem to feed into the Hollywood junk, and he seems like he'd be a cool guy to know.

Here are some trailers for the aforementioned films:

Twilight: The Oscar buzz will be starting ANY minute! (Spoiler Alert)

Last night, I braved the throngs of teenage girls and went to see Twilight.   Now I can confidently say that Robert Pattinson is the most attractive person in entire universe, and it seems that...I'm slightly obsessed.  Why do such beautiful people exist, if not only to torture us?!  They slap him on a screen, and then I'm left to know that we'll never be together...unless I moved to Hollywood and became an actress (which is my dream...well my dream is actually to do Broadway musicals in NYC, but that's another story).

So now I'll cut the crap- the movie was great.  It was pretty hilarious.  Edward was a riot when he had to sit by Bella in science class (oh- and we all rejoiced when they won the "golden onion").  I also got a big chuckle out of the Cullens making Italian food for Bella.  You see, they made her Italian food because her name is Bella, an Italian word...you just have to see it.  Oh!  And the special effects only added to the humor.  When they ran in supersonic speed, they looked like rabid gerbils!  It was great.

Some of the romantic scenes were hard to watch.  And despite what you may be thinking, NO I don't mean it was hard watching ole' Rob kiss another woman...  They were difficult because some of the moments were so awkward.  It was like I felt embarrassed for them at some parts.  The teenage sexual tension was out of this world!  You could cut it with a knife!!! That tension could be derived from the rumored "off screen romance" going on between Pattinson and Kristen Stuart, but that's just according to Life  Style Magazine.

Obviously, Pattinson was the perfect Edward.  He was a bigger jerk then I made him out for in the books.  But what girl doesn't love a little bit of a-hole (ehhh...that didn't quite sound right...you know what I mean)?  But yeah, it was fantastic when Bella and him made their big entrance as a couple at school for the first time.  Amazing! Some of the finest cinematic work I've seen to date!

A few things I noticed:

1. I think they went a little overboard with some of the Cullens' paleness.  Carlile's eyebrows were caked with white makeup, AND his ears were a different (more lively) color than his puss (that's another word for face...trust me.)  I think Jasper was victim of mime face as well.
2. I thought all the Cullens were supposed to be painfully beautiful, and Jasper was not.  He looked kind of special...but that might be because he was a young vampire and was just trying desperately to restrain himself from making a snack out of our protagonist.
3. The guy who played James (Cam Gigandet, who was Kevin Volchuck- my favorite cokehead from The OC) is hot.  Too bad he had to die and can't be in the sequels!
4. At one point, Bella was just sitting around talking on the phone to her mother and not wearing any pants.  I just thought it was random, and THAT def did NOT happen in the book.  Or maybe it did and Meyer just failed to mention it.
5. There were a lot of references to monkies.  "You better hold on spider monkey," "Look at my monkey man," etc.

So yes, I cannot wait for the sequels!  AH!  I can hardly stand it.  I'm a woman possessed, and I'm not afraid who knows it!  And if you haven't guessed, I give Twilight MMMMM!  FIVE OUT OF FIVE Ms!

Cliff Pant-one's Most Fascinating People: Robert Pattinson

What makes Robert Pattinson fascinating?  Well for one, he is playing Edward Cullen in the upcoming feature film Twilight (based on the novel by the same name).  Edward Cullen is fascinating himself, but I'm trying to stick to actual people here.  Aside from his fortune in the casting department,  there are many more intriguing tid bits meshing together to construct Pattinson. 

For starters, Pattinson is sooo FINE (channeling my 7^th grade lingo w/ the “fine…”)!  On top of that, he doesn’t bathe.  Just the other day, Pattinson was quoted saying, “I haven't washed my hair in about six weeks. It's disgusting.”  Oh yeah- he also said that he doesn’t know how to use a washing machine.  I mean, he’s only 22...  You know, it took me a while to get the swing of operating my more complex appliances as well, so I can’t really judge.  I don’t know about you, but I find all that highly captivating.  I’m a firm believer that sometimes NOT showering or abiding by ususal standards regarding  your personal hygine can actually IMPROVE your looks.   In my opinion, this theory most often holds true in males.  For instance, Justin Bobby from MTV’s hit reality program, The Hills, is a prime example.  It also works with certain construction workers and bums.  Seriously.  The dirtier they are the more I have to restrain my love for them.  But yeah, it’s a compelling theory.

Next point- Robert Pattinson is from London.  This means he has a British accent.   Now, I myself prefer a thick Bostonian brouge, but nonetheless, any accent can be charming.

More fascinating than any of the preceding information may be this fact:  Robert has a crazy look in his eyes!  It’s either sex or madness...or it could be drugs.  I’m not sure which, but any of those options would make him even more captivating.  It lets us know that there is MORE behind the surface.  Gosh, it’s no wonder that they cast Pattinson as Edward! 

Cliff Pant-one's Most Fascinating People: Eva Amurri

Eva Amurri is extremely fascinating!  She's the 23 year old  daughter of Italian director Franco Amurri and actress Susan Sarandon.  For one, I have always thought that Susan Sarandon would be an amazing mom.  I don't know her personally or anything, but I base my assumption solely on Sarandon's role in Little Women.  I also really really loved Thelma and Louise, and although she and Jimmy didn't exactly seem like the paternal types in that movie, I still hold firm to my hypothesis.  But yeah, I imagine that being Susan Sarandon's kid would be pretty excellent. 

Besides that, Eva has been in some movies herself.  Saved being one of my favorites.  She played Cassandra, the sarcastic Jewish girl in an evangelical Christian school.  She was hilarious in that movie, and I think she looked really great...even if she did look a little Hot Topic-ed out.  She also dated Macaulay Culkin in that movie, and I think they had some pretty great chemistry. 

Eva has also been other movies like The Banger Sisters and The Education of Charlie Banks.  Maybe her film career wouldn't be as successful if she didn't have famous parents, but whatever.  I think she's talented and acting is probably in her genes.

Another cool thing about her is that she graduated from Brown University.  So at least she'll have that degree to fall back on if her acting doesn't work out.

I think Eva Amurri is one of the most beautiful people ever!  I don't know why.  She's a little quirky looking, and I guess I like that sort of thing.  It makes her all the more intriguing.  She also kind of floats under the radar, which makes her more mysterious and even more absorbing!  And lastly, her birthday is on March 15, and I have some sort of obsession with people born on that day.

There you have it, FASCINATION AT ITS FINEST!

PS This new Typepad jazz is terrible.  It's going so slow and freezing up every second.  Maybe I'll update and make this better once the kinks get worked out...hopefully they WILL get worked out!!!

Misty Water Colored Memories: The ButterCream Gang

When I was little, I loved the movie The ButterCream Gang.  It was one of those straight to video Feature Films For Families that gets delivered right to your door. 

The movie was about a group of kids (Scott, Lanny and Eldon) who go around doing good deeds in their small town.  These do-gooders call themselves The ButterCream Gang.  Mostly they just helped the Window Jenkins, but they were still pillars of their quaint little society!

Well, the action in the movie starts when an old friend Pete comes back to town.  Pete has been living in the big city, where whomever he was living with made spaghetti with ketchup (I distinctively remember him saying that).  Since Pete had a taste of life in the fast lane, he's all crazy!  Scott, Lanny and Eldon invite him back into the BC Gang, but Pete seems a little too far gone.  He even starts dressing like a hispanic gangster, opting only to fasten the TOP button of his dress shirt and wrapping his dome with a dingy bandana.  I mean, he's even goes to Mr. Graff's store saying that he's going to "buy neon shoelaces," but he really steals treats!  Then Pete meets some other small town ruffians, and they start their own youth-gang- a dangerous, edgy youth gang!  They find some young girl in the neighborhood and circle her with their bikes!  Thank goodness Scott comes to her rescue!!!  Then Pete tries to rob Mr. Graff's store! That is when his most powerful acting comes out.  He really goes bananas. What the heck could have happened to him in Chicago?!  I don't think they ever reveal that.

I'm sure you're all wondering where the cast is now.  Well, it looks like the rebel Pete has developed quite a resume.  His real name is Michael D. Wheatherred, and he has been in a lot of films that I've never seen.  The only other movie that Scott, Lanny OR Eldon were in was The ButterCream Gang in Secret of Treasure Mountain (the sequel).  I guess they were at risk of being typecast!  Same for Window Jenkins, I'm afraid! 

Well, if you haven't seen this movie, you should.  It's a good laugh.  Even when I was seven, I thought it was incredibly cheesy.  I doubt they sell it anymore.  You could probably find it on ebay.  DO IT! And please enjoy these clips:

Twilight & New Moon by Stephenie Meyer

I have just finished reading Twilight and New Moon by Stephenie Meyer.  They are the first two books in her Twilight Series.  Currently, there are four books total, and they are all the rage.  It's rumored that they will become as big as Harry Potter.  I never read Harry Potter, but I CAN'T put these books down!

The Twilight Series follows Bella Swan though high school as she falls in love with a vampire!  It sounds really stupid and like something I would avoid at all costs, but it is REALLY good.  The vampire's name is Edward and I am obsessed with him.  He is such an amazing character!  It's sad, but I have found myself listening to songs on the radio and thinking, OHMIGOD BELLA AND EDWARD WOULD LOVE THIS SONG!  I feel like I know them.  The characters just come alive. 

On top of having great plot lines, suspense and romance, there is some teen angst!  I love it!  And even though the book is about vampires,  I feel myself relating with the characters.  Ehhh.  That did not sound good.  I just meant that a lot of the high school feelings and experiences that Bella went through are universal, and Meyer describes them in great detail.  AND bestsellers are bestsellers because readers relate to them and empathize and feel like the story is meant for THEM! 

Anyways, I can't wait to read the next two books.  And I really can't wait until December, because that is when Twilight the movie is coming out.  I hope it is portrayed well (I can see it getting corny if they aren't careful).  Get ready, because I'm pretty sure Twilight mania is about to be bestowed upon us! 

Twilight and New Moon BOTH recieve MMMMM (5 out of 5 Ms)!!!

American Teen: How M-worthy is it?!

I went to see American Teen tonight.  Directed by Nanette Burnstein, American Teen is a documentary that follows the lives of a handful of high school seniors in Warsaw, Indiana. 

I loved it.  I thought it was a pretty accurate portrayal of high school life.  There were a lot of funny moments and then there were some where I wanted to scream, "SNAP OUT OF IT, KID!"  Thankfully, I restrained myself.

Either way, I think this film will be a big success.  American Teen definitely had that MTV reality vibe, but in a way that was way toned down. The kids in the movie aren't fake looking Barbie dolls or hired actors (like on The Hills).  The setting is less than glamorous.  There isn't blaring Indy rock thumping in the background of every scene.  It feels real, and I think that's because it is.

It's also very witty.  There are some scenes that are done in animation.  It usually bugs me when digital stuff is just thrown into a regular movie, but in American Teen's case, it worked for me.  There was one especially funny scene where everybody at Notre Dame joined hands and swayed in unison to show that the campus there is full of people who "care" and pretty much like an alternate universe.   The kids make hilarious comments without even trying.  Aren't high schoolers great?  Maybe I should go back and be a teacher?

So this movie earns a whopping MMMMM (5 out of 5 Ms)!!!! I've always enjoyed documentaries, even before realty TV came out (and it's NO big secret that I love reality TV). And on top of loving documentaries, I love teen angst.  Who doesn't?!  I don't want to spoil anything, but I really recommend this movie.  Please go see it.  Here is the trailer:

Pineapple Express

Pineapple Express, starring Seth Rogen (of Knocked Up and Superbad) and James Franco, is a heartfelt story of friendship.  Rogen plays Dale, a weed loving process server (process server being a fancy way to say LEGAL COURIER- like me).  Franco is the lovable, laid back drug dealer, Saul.   Dave and Saul get mixed up in some drug dealing drama, and chaos ensues. 

This movie is HILARIOUS.  Gosh, I laughed so hard.  Seth Rogen is one of the funniest people on the planet.  James Franco was just as hysterical.  I've never really seen any of his movies, but he is a riot (and really hot).  With a lot of comedies, the trailer can give away most of the funny parts.  That was not the case with this movie.  It was a laugh a minute!

Besides being extremely witty and comical, the movie was intense, suspenseful and exciting.  There were a lot of action scenes.  I was on the edge of my seat the whole time. 

My ONLY complaint about the  movie, was that it was very violent.  I mean, it wasn't really in a bad way, but I just not insane about guns and killing and stuff.

This movie pretty much has it all.  It's a funny, druggie, action, touching movie. It kind of reminded me of a funnier/lighter version of Pulp Fiction.  It is fabulous.  MMMMM (5 out of 5 Ms)!  Go see it ASAP!  Here is the trailer:  

And none for Gretchen Weiners...

I have no idea who these people are, but this made me laugh REALLY hard.

Peter Mcalister, The Father...

I think the clip speaks for itself!

Sex and the City: The Movie (May contain spoilers!)

Of course, I am one of those girls who got tickets in advance for the Sex and the City premier.   I was really excited to see it.  I LOVE SATC,but the movie was not great.  This is just my opinion.  I know a lot of other people loved it.

There were only a handful of funny moments.  And for the most part, I felt like I was laughing just because everybody else was (I feel like such a follower).  Plus, I had prepared for some tears to be shed.  I was in the right mind frame for a real good cry...but none came.  Nothing in the movie touched me to the point of tears. 

The movie seemed a little long, but it did manage to keep my attention. Miranda's character was a real pill.  I wanted to punch her for most of the movie.  Jennifer Hudson plays Carrie's personal assistant, and her acting was not very good.  She seemed totally corny...very Saved by the Bell. 

I do love Samantha though.  She'll always make me laugh.  In my opinion, she was the saving grace of the movie.  Although, she was living in LA- and that just seemed kind of weird to me.  Oh yeah, and she had a dog (that wasn't very cute) and they never even told what the dog's name was (unless I missed that)...it just humped everything.  But otherwise, she made some hilarious comments. 

I know my blog is supposed to be positive, but I was just so excited for the movie.  I feel a little let down.  I just thought I should at least write about it.  Maybe I just need to watch it again.  Maybe it will grow on me.  I hope so. Oh and I heard that they're already talking about making a sequel. 

Rating: MMM (3 out of 5 Ms)

Forgetting Sarah Marshall

I know this movie has been out for a while, but I saw Forgetting Sarah Marshall last night. It was REALLY good!  Jason Segel (from Knocked Up & SLC Punk) wrote and starred in the movie.  The premise is that Jason plays Peter, a guy who just got dumped by his famous girlfriend, Sarah Marshall (played by Kristen Bell- the voice of Gossip Girl).  So he is all depressed and goes to Hawaii to forget about her.  But to his surprise, Sarah Marshall is staying at the same hotel as Peter with her new rock star boyfriend.  Chaos ensues!

Jason Segel was hilarious and adorable (plus, you get to see him full frontal...a few times).  I think I'm in love (but not because of the full frontal thing)!  Mila Kunis (from That 70s Show) played his love interest, and she looked BEAUTIFUL!  The movie was pretty funny and an overall great story.  It's really cute, but still has the crude humor you'd expect for the 40 Year Old Virgin crew.  It's not too long.  It doesn't drag on forever.  Guys and girls would both like it.  There's even a really memorable Dracula song.  If you haven't seen it already, go see it this weekend when Sex and The City sells out.

My overall rating: MMMM^ (4.25 Ms out of 5)